November 23, 2006

Long Time No See!!

Wow it has been a while since I have been here. Its Been a good long and very confusing journy so far. It seems like everytime I find an answer to one of my questions, two more questions pop up.
Sometimes I wownder if anyone can(or is) 100% happy with who they are or who they have become after they have gone thru this process. To me it seems like that old quote " An Artist is never truely Complete with his work" or somethign like that. At this point in my trasformation I Dont see how I can Possibly get to a point were I can be complelty happy with the end Product, there s just too much to learn from. This is a long journey across a winding path that has no signs, and some days it seem like its all a uphill battle. But this battle I know I can win!

With all that said, I dont think I would be were I am today if it wasnt for certain people. Many people fail to understand how important it is to surround yourself with other people who can help you understand and provide that support you need. Many people have always said that you have to surround yourself with people who are positive in order to keep yourself positive, and now i have found that to be true.

There are many people who have flocked to the "community" in order to improve who they are, but not everyone is here for the same reason. I am happy that I came across people who believe in what I bealieve in, people who can be kind and very honest at the same time. Not everyone who I have come across have what it takes to become a better person, or to make you a better person.

I have always had fun with all my "freinds" but I never understod what they meant to me. I always assumed that as long as we could chill hang out and have fun, thats all that was needed for a freindship. I never realy understood that freinds do more that just chil/hang out or even help each other out of a rut. I failed to reailize that those people that you called freinds have to be able to push you to become a better person also, they have to back you up 100%(in a positive way) when you come across changes.

The old saying "Birds of a Feather Flock Together" seems to be true. All the people (most not all) seem to be happy with thier lives. they all do the same Beta gestures, they all act the same around women, and most off all they seem to be happy while doing certain activities that get them nowhere.
Why would anyone want to do different? Everyone around you is doing the same, they arent pushing you to become better. Everyone is happy with theier mundane life. A life where they have no choices, they cant choose who they want to spend their lives or what to do with thier lives.
I guess I am one of the lucky ones. I have always tried to improve myself, and looked for people who had the same mindset. And thanks to thme I have come a long way.